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Friday, 24 September 2010

The Wind in the Hollows

I've noticed a rather disturbing tendency amongst men of a 'certain age' to do things in the gym changing room that one would hope they would not do even in the privacy (or privy as Benny Hill used to memorably say) of their own homes.

I'm talking principally about (and readers of a nervous disposition may turn away now) the drying of one's important little places with a hair dryer. Why would anyone want to do this? Is it some misguided attempt to smooth out the wrinkles? If this is the case, I have to say they are definitely barking up the wrong tree. I doubt if the combined skills of Elizabeth Arden, Nivea and Oil of Olay (why did that stop being Ulay, by the way?)could ever smooth out the deep wrinkles surrounding the geriatric gonads. Perhaps we worry more down there?

There is certainly something deeply disturbing about watching pensioners, legs akimbo, fanning their genitalia with warm breezes. It certainly (if somewhat illogically) puts you off using said hair dryers for their actual purpose.

Of course, odd and possibly unhygienic behaviour is not just limited to the silver surfers. This morning I witnessed the unedifying sight of young chap clipping his toenails in the washbasin. Whilst you have to applaud the flexibility that allowed him to do this, you would really rather it wasn't happening at all.

Somehow, I can't imagine this sort of thing happens in the ladies locker rooms but maybe you can tell me otherwise?