Enter the slightly odd world of Phil Whiteland for a different view of today and yesterday that you might just find amusing.
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A Dog is not just for Christmas...but these two could be!
I promised you some news about Rohan and India, so here it is! The brand new book of stories about their lives at TURN Education is now av...
Tuesday, 31 October 2017
It's Halloween and it's out there!
Published today (31st October, 2017) and what better day for a book called "The Things You See..."?
Philip’s back with a fifth collection of stories, both ‘nostalgedy’(a mixture of nostalgia and comedy) and other observational pieces in which he takes a wry look at times past and present.
Every book has to have a theme and the structure for this one came whilst he was idly munching a chocolate bar. You know that one which used to promise to help you work, rest and play? Well, this book consists of Work, Play and the Rest.
In ‘Work’ Philip joins the ranks of the employed at the beginning of the 1970s, firstly as an inept packer of plastics before moving to ‘a nice dry job with no heavy lifting’ in a dark, satanic paper mill. We learn about his struggles with punctuality, the difficulties of working in the darkness of the 3-Day-Week and why he had a real reason to be grateful for Ted Heath.
‘Play’ brings tales of a boozy holiday in Franco’s Majorca in the 1970s, a fleeting role in a ‘Look at Life’ documentary, Cilla Black, Soap Operas, an insight into the Cultural Quarter of Stoke-on-Trent and some tales from a trip to Australia.
Finally, ‘the Rest’ shovels up everything that wouldn’t fit into the first two, including a tour around a pub in the 1960s*, getting a brace fitted at the dentist’s, difficulties with sanitary arrangements, why grass should be left alone, why shopping with your wife is an overrated pastime, a grumble about grammar and why it is absolutely fine to be a NIMBY. All wrapped up with the Title article, which is not for the faint-hearted.
Come and join Philip in his Slightly Odd World, you won’t regret it!
Buy it now for the introductory price of just £1.49! You'll never believe "The Things You See..."
* includes a visit to the infamous attic rooms from 'And things that go bump in the night' as we discover just what is in the locked attic.
Wednesday, 25 October 2017
Making Waves on the Radio
This month's Derby Telegraph article in which I put the 'oik' into work!
This is the unedited version of the article:
I mentioned, in a previous
article, that I now had a companion in my office in Harold Wesley's in the
1970s. Actually, that makes it sound
like I had an office to myself, which was never really the case. I had been parked in the Work's Manager's
office but that clearly wasn't a viable solution as I had to be turfed out
every time he had a confidential meeting, which could be several times a
day. It did give me the opportunity to
explore the building at length, which was fascinating but not really
productive.
In a relatively short time, a
couple of new offices were constructed next door to the Work's Manager's office
(Work's Managers can get this sort of thing done). I was to share the first one with A.N. Other
and the second was for person or persons unknown.
The A.N. Other turned out to be
Gwen, who was something else. Tall,
beautiful and stylishly dressed she made me, in my 'nearly suit' and with my
more or less permanent hangover , feel
like something of an 'oik', which probably wasn't a million miles away from the
truth. Fortunately she wasn't just a
pretty face, she also had a wicked sense of humour, a quick wit and, wonder of
wonders, she found me funny! Beautiful
women finding me funny was not a regular occurrence, so this was definitely a
turn up for the books.
Gwen had clearly noted my 'oik'
potential. As she says in her memoir
(Wednesday's Child) "The Transport
Club in Guild Street…was where he mostly spent his evenings and often spent
most of the night/morning sobering up". To which I can only say, guilty as charged,
although I had hoped it wasn't quite that obvious. She goes on to say that the Work's
Manager "came into our office on occasions I guess to keep us on our toes
particularly if he thought there was too much frivolity as he could hear us as
our offices were only partitioned with glass". Obviously, enjoying yourself at work is
not something to be encouraged and it certainly wasn't in the dark ages of the
1970s.
Before long, we had another
addition to our small office, Paul, an earnest young chap who was just starting
on his career ladder as the Manager of the Wrapping Paper Dept. For a time, this rather put a crimp on any
frivolity but he did gradually thaw although I think he very definitely
recognised my inherent 'oik'ness. He was
much closer to Gwen in age and was markedly more mature than me, although that
wouldn't have been difficult. He had a
career and was just about to get married, I wouldn't have known a career if it
had bitten me and I had only recently had my first girlfriend, a relationship
so successful that, as Gwen recorded "I
remember he came in one morning and said he woke up in a puddle".
It speaks volumes that Paul was
responsible for a whole department whereas I had been given responsibility for
the work's radio. This was a minor nod
toward staff welfare. It was basically a
car radio which had been wired into the firm's P.A. system and mounted on the
wall of our office. Management had
decreed that the workforce were not to have too much of a good thing and that
the radio was only to be on for one hour, twice a day. This afforded them an hour of Johnny Walker
in the morning and another of Noel Edmonds in the afternoon. I always hated turning the radio off at the
end of the hour because you could hear a factory-wide "Awww" go up
every time. It also seemed obvious to me
that people trapped in a monotonous job, in fairly basic working conditions,
were likely to be happier and work better if they had something to take their
mind off it all. Then again, what did I
know? So, I sometimes 'forgot' to turn
off the radio until one or other of the managers rang up, or stormed in, to
complain.
It wasn't much of a rebellion,
but it was popular on the shop-floor.
Philip's latest collection of stories "The Things You See…"
will be published on 31st October and is available to pre-order now for just
£1.49 at http://mybook.to/ThingsYouSee
Tuesday, 10 October 2017
The Things You See...
Delighted to say this new book in the 'nostalgedy' series is now available for pre-order, prior to the publication date of 31st October, 2017 (what other date could you have for something called 'The Things You See...'?)
The Things You See...
In ‘Work’ Philip joins the ranks of the employed at the beginning of the 1970s, firstly as an inept packer of plastics before moving to ‘a nice dry job with no heavy lifting’ in a dark, satanic paper mill. We learn about his struggles with punctuality, the difficulties of working in the darkness of the 3-Day-Week and why he had a real reason to be grateful for Ted Heath.
‘Play’ brings tales of a boozy holiday in Franco’s Majorca in the 1970s, a fleeting role in a ‘Look at Life’ documentary, Cilla Black, Soap Operas, an insight into the Cultural Quarter of Stoke-on-Trent and some tales from a trip to Australia.
Finally, ‘the Rest’ shovels up everything that wouldn’t fit into the first two, including a tour around a pub in the 1960s, getting a brace fitted at the dentist’s, difficulties with sanitary arrangements, why grass should be left alone, why shopping with your wife is an overrated pastime, a grumble about grammar and why it is absolutely fine to be a NIMBY. All wrapped up with the Title article, which is not for the faint-hearted.
Come and join Philip in his Slightly Odd World, you won’t regret it!
Here's the blurb:
Philip’s back with a fifth collection of stories, both ‘nostalgedy’(a mixture of nostalgia and comedy) and other observational pieces in which he takes a wry look at times past and present.
Every book has to have a theme and the structure for this one came whilst he was idly munching a chocolate bar. You know that one which used to promise to help you work, rest and play? Well, this book consists of Work, Play and the Rest.
Every book has to have a theme and the structure for this one came whilst he was idly munching a chocolate bar. You know that one which used to promise to help you work, rest and play? Well, this book consists of Work, Play and the Rest.
In ‘Work’ Philip joins the ranks of the employed at the beginning of the 1970s, firstly as an inept packer of plastics before moving to ‘a nice dry job with no heavy lifting’ in a dark, satanic paper mill. We learn about his struggles with punctuality, the difficulties of working in the darkness of the 3-Day-Week and why he had a real reason to be grateful for Ted Heath.
‘Play’ brings tales of a boozy holiday in Franco’s Majorca in the 1970s, a fleeting role in a ‘Look at Life’ documentary, Cilla Black, Soap Operas, an insight into the Cultural Quarter of Stoke-on-Trent and some tales from a trip to Australia.
Finally, ‘the Rest’ shovels up everything that wouldn’t fit into the first two, including a tour around a pub in the 1960s, getting a brace fitted at the dentist’s, difficulties with sanitary arrangements, why grass should be left alone, why shopping with your wife is an overrated pastime, a grumble about grammar and why it is absolutely fine to be a NIMBY. All wrapped up with the Title article, which is not for the faint-hearted.
Come and join Philip in his Slightly Odd World, you won’t regret it!
Saturday, 7 October 2017
New Review
Always nice to get a positive review for one of my books and even better when it comes from another 'ex-pat' Burtonian! Carol posted this yesterday for the 'Crutches for Ducks' collection:
It's Great!
"Such a laugh. It reminded me of my own childhood in The Midlands. It will surely put a smile on anyone's face and Philip has a knack for getting it just right. Well done, it's great.
You can find the original review here
Thanks very much, Carol. Very much appreciated.
Sunday, 1 October 2017
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